Post dated apology.

“I apologise in advance” he shouted, over the alcohol spills across the drunken table, “I’ve probably left you with a lot to do eh?“. He might not of actually been aware of it at the time, but he wasn’t kidding. I knew he wasn’t, but I raised my glass and smiled regardless.

Picking up people’s slack when they’ve been made redundant is all well and good, hell to be honest I’m grateful to stamp my name all over this project if it means censoring them out, but the reason for their absence becomes ever clear after the fact. I don’t just have a lot to do any more, I’ve got everything you’ve ever done to do, and about 2% of the time it took you to do it, too.

It’s probably not very nice of me to rag on people who’ve just been made redundant, it’s probably not very nice of  anyone to do it, now that I think about it. So I apologise in advance, unemployed’ers… you’ve given me too much to be quiet about.

I’m sick of the “first pass” attitude, to say that something is done but “needs another go at some other point down the line“, and the higher ups tend to agree with this mentality out of fear for not wanting to seem like cruel bastards. “Sure, that’s fine… we’ll do it properly later“. ARE YOU FUCKING LISTENING TO YOURSELVES!? Do you give them warm milk and let them out for playtime too? You pay these people to do a job they claim to be able to do, their résumés could fucking crush me with how theoretically capable they are. I’m of the school that “things need to be done right”, I know there will be changes, you can predict changes by not predicting changes, because a lot of things will change throughout the course of a project, it’s just a case of which direction it comes from, but this isn’t about change, it’s about replacing, and it needs to stop. It’s slowing everything down, it always does… it’s ground me to a halt.

It’s bad enough that I have to keep an eye on everything you do like a paranoid babysitter, constantly checking your work and always fixing it after you’ve gone home. I could just leave it, but I intend to be part of a product that had effort put into it. I can’t even begin to imagine how much shit I’d have to do right now if I hadn’t been trying to keep on top of it all since day 1. But I am just one man, and the mistakes came in three’s… it was a losing battle to begin with, and only now can I start to balance things out a little more, because you’re not around to screw me over and constantly ignore a little thing called standards.

I enjoy helping people, I really do. But not you… the only reason I still did it was in the hopes of minimising the damage when it inevitably came back to me, and still you manage to make it difficult. It’s impressive, I’m impressed… congratulations, It’s outstanding how long you’ve managed to remain in employment. Add that to your fucking résumé. I wonder, daily… just how screwed we’d all be if I’d left everything alone, if I hadn’t fixed, replaced, optimised and guided, if I’d just sat there and got on with my own job, y’know… like how it should have been. This isn’t an ego talking either… I love to write but I genuinely couldn’t pour out that many words in relation to how much your incompetence could have meant the overall failure of our project.

You’ve destroyed everything I thought this industry was, you’re lazy and you cannot learn. This is not a regular 9-5, this is a choice you’re getting paid for. Go do something else, although I guess now you don’t have much say in that. I feel sorry for whoever hires you next, you’re expired goods, your time in this industry was over the day you decided to drop initiative, misplace motivation, put “first passes” into production, list them as complete and then fuck around on Farmville all day. I’m annoyed that your CV’s look so good, on paper you’re a companies wet fucking dream but in reality you do more harm than good.

Now I’m not saying I’m a saint,  I’m still young, the passion comes easy… but the learning fucking didn’t, I worked a lot harder than I should have to compete with you, but I guess that’s old news now. You’re through. You’re lovely people, you are, but if I ever end up working with you again, I will give great thought into leaving.

… I mean I probably won’t actually leave, I guess I’ll probably just give up, do my own job and let everyone see every fuck up you produce, that should be easy.

Have yourselves a nice break, maybe take the time to look at our product when we release it… and again, I apologise in advance, but there’s a reason you’re going to be pointing and saying “I don’t remember making it like that”, it’s because you made it wrong, what you’re now looking at is the result of competent people doing things right. I know it’s strange, don’t be afraid, embrace it… hell, maybe even learn how to do it for once.

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